You are so beautiful, to me.
You're everything I hoped for and you're everything I need.
Only, people don't always get what they hope for and the need is, in reality, more of a want than a need. I can live without you, I just don't want to.
We were so close and yet, now, I am unable to touch you, unable to talk to you. Where once I was the most important thing in your world, now, I am nothing. Once I could say anything to you, now I have to check my words and check my actions. It hurts to know what I have lost. The fear that I'll never get it back hurts nearly to the point of breaking me. The old saying goes that it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. Do I believe that? I'm not so sure I do. If I had no memory of you it wouldn't hurt.
But I realise, in the end, the saying is right. I couldn't give up the knowledge of you even if I was offered the opportunity. I couldn't resign myself to a life where I didn't know the sound of your voice, your sense of humour, where I didn't know you. I would rather have a heart-ache that lasts the rest of my life than to have gone through that life never knowing who you are.
I will wait for you, as I have been for a while now. I want to stop but I can't bring myself to. Everytime I try to walk away it lasts only a moment before I give in. I am weak but that is my problem, not yours. You have not lead me to believe there is a future for us any longer. If that is true and we cannot be together then so be it. I want you to be happy and, while I want that happiness to be with me, if it is not then I can accept that. I have no choice but to accept it.
Not everyone can have a happy ending. If they could then it wouldn't be a happy ending it would just be an ending. There must be those who suffer unhappy endings in order for those with happy endings to really appreciate what they have. I would gladly give you my happy ending. I will continue to wish that our ending could be together, but if it can't, and if I could choose, then I would give my happy ending to you.
I just hope you don't mind that I will continue to be here. There may be a wall of glass that I cannot penetrate between us now but I cannot just turn my back. De te Fabula. The story, whatever the story, is always about you share this: facebook
Only, people don't always get what they hope for and the need is, in reality, more of a want than a need. I can live without you, I just don't want to.
We were so close and yet, now, I am unable to touch you, unable to talk to you. Where once I was the most important thing in your world, now, I am nothing. Once I could say anything to you, now I have to check my words and check my actions. It hurts to know what I have lost. The fear that I'll never get it back hurts nearly to the point of breaking me. The old saying goes that it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. Do I believe that? I'm not so sure I do. If I had no memory of you it wouldn't hurt.
But I realise, in the end, the saying is right. I couldn't give up the knowledge of you even if I was offered the opportunity. I couldn't resign myself to a life where I didn't know the sound of your voice, your sense of humour, where I didn't know you. I would rather have a heart-ache that lasts the rest of my life than to have gone through that life never knowing who you are.
I will wait for you, as I have been for a while now. I want to stop but I can't bring myself to. Everytime I try to walk away it lasts only a moment before I give in. I am weak but that is my problem, not yours. You have not lead me to believe there is a future for us any longer. If that is true and we cannot be together then so be it. I want you to be happy and, while I want that happiness to be with me, if it is not then I can accept that. I have no choice but to accept it.
Not everyone can have a happy ending. If they could then it wouldn't be a happy ending it would just be an ending. There must be those who suffer unhappy endings in order for those with happy endings to really appreciate what they have. I would gladly give you my happy ending. I will continue to wish that our ending could be together, but if it can't, and if I could choose, then I would give my happy ending to you.
I just hope you don't mind that I will continue to be here. There may be a wall of glass that I cannot penetrate between us now but I cannot just turn my back. De te Fabula. The story, whatever the story, is always about you share this: facebook
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on Thursday, May 17, 2007 at 1:15 AM.
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