The World Of Jadeey

All they know is when we fight, they don't see us in the loving times. What do they know? They don't know a thing.

Not my own words but very correct for a situation I now find myself in. He treats me badly sometimes without doubt, but those are the times I talk about so it probably comes across as worse than it is. Sometimes, and they are brilliant, wonderful sometimes, he is the sweetest guy in the world. In those times I wouldn't want to be with anyone but him. I'm dangerously close to falling in love with him and that's why I'm following friends' advice and trying to avoid him. I know in the current situation I will only get hurt. But if circumstance change, I need for him to be given another chance.

Labels: boys, relationships

I should be working right now. Instead I keep stalling. I'm sitting in my bloody office at work having to hold back tears. This isn't right and this isn't cool. I've always been a firm believer in not bringing my problems to work. I haven't always succeeded in this - I remember a time just over a year ago when, once everyone was gone, I crawled under the desk and just sat there. I couldn't bear to be out in the open, I needed to be in a small space. Right now I want nothing more than to do that again. I'm hoping that by wasting time at work writing this I bring my productivity back up to speed. There is far to much to be done here to have me not operating at full capacity.

I dunno what's up with me. Actually, that's not true. I know exactly what's up with me but I dunno how to write it here because it's not something I want to share with the world. Ordinarily this is a post that would not get put on the internet but just stay on my computer at home but today, out of necessity, its getting written and shared with the world.

Maybe it's that time of year, everyone I know is depressed. Hopefully tomorrow will dawn as a better day. This is not a good start to being a 24 year old.

Labels: boys, mood, relationships