The World Of Jadeey

So, I'm in Wellington.

I'm on my own at the moment because pretty much everyone I know is at work. I'm just hanging out at my friends place while I wait for my dad to come pick me up. I'm having dinner with the parents, then probably spending the day with them tomorrow before the game tomorrow night.

I feel a bit weird even though the house I am currently sitting in used to be mine. In fact, the computer I am using IS mine, I just left it here for my friend to use rather than taking it to Auckland with me since I also have a laptop. Still, I feel weird about being alone here and weird about using this computer. I never like to use other people's computers because, even though I would never touch any of their personal documents, it feels like an invasion of privacy. So, even though this computer is mine, I feel like I'm doing something I shouldn't be. How weird is that!

It was strange leaving Auckland on the plane last night. For the first time I realised that I actually consider Auckland home now and I was sad to leave. This scares me a wee bit since I'm going to be leaving for good in a little under 3 weeks. I know I've made the right decision about leaving work, I don't want to be there anymore, but I'm still sad. I'm sad that so many years with a company I have really enjoyed working for is ending. I'm sad about leaving all of my friends in Auckland. I know I could have stayed there and found a new job but it somehow seems easier in Wellington. There aren't as many job prospects, sure, but I have people I can live with for free (aka dad) while I figure some stuff out. If I'd stayed in Auckland I'd have had to job-hunt while still in my current job and would probably have just ended up in another job that I don't enjoy as much as I want to enjoy my job. Hopefully, this way, I'll end up in a job I REALLY enjoy. That's why I think I made the right decision, but it sure is sad.

Okay I'm going to go watch a dvd before dad gets here.

I can travel anywhere, except Cuba, and I will travel to New Zealand and walk the Lord of the Rings trail to Mordor and I will hike Mount Doom.

I'm minutes away from getting picked up to go to the airport. I forgot to pack last night (seriously, I didn't even think about it) so had to rush home from work in order to get packed and ready to go. Luckily I'm an expert packer and it didn't take me long at all, so now I'm sitting here all ready to go.

I'm pretty terrified about tomorrow. This interview is going to be SCARY! Once that's all over I can just relax and enjoy myself luckily.

Work was a wee bit of a nightmare. Nightmare is probably the completely wrong word. It's just stressful cos I've now only got 3 rosters and 2 stocktakes left before I'm gone. At this point in time my stocktake people are nowhere near ready. I'm going to have to sit down and have a real think about how to get them ready in time.

I tell you what though, some people at work make stuff so much harder than they need to. Things that I would think are relatively easy are laboured over by others sometimes. Perhaps it's actually that I'm remiss in what I do. Not sure.

Okay, enough rambling. I've got a plane to catch and a Beckham to watch!! Woo!

And we're back to Office quotes as titles.

I'm flying down to Wellington tomorrow night after work. The main reason I'm going is to watch David Beckham, but as an added bonus I get to see my friends as well.

One terrible thing that is happening (not really terrible, just scary) is that I have an interview for the course I REALLY want to do next year. It's a post-graduate diploma in publishing, and they don't accept very many people each year. The scary part is that I have to do a 40 minute exam, mainly grammar. Now, anyone who reads this blog knows exactly how shocking my grammar is. I have a feeling I'm not going to get accepted onto the course.

The exam includes having to read some work and make corrections, judge a piece of writing and do some writing of our own. Gah!! I mean, I understand that this is what I would be doing as a publisher, but somehow I thought I'd get good at it between now and the end of the course. The added stress of being in an exam-type situation is not going to help me score better either!

I wish I was at Justin Timberlake's concert again right now. Stupid ordinary life!

... Jim, and to everyone else in the circle, I guess, is that I miss having fun with you. Just you, not everyone in the circle.

I sometimes sit and wonder where I went wrong. I get totally consumed with the fact that it all went wrong; that, despite my insistence to the contrary most of the time, I'm not even half over him; that I would still give it all up for him if he asked.

The pain has definitely dulled. It used to a sharp, stabbing pain. It used to affect every single bloody thing I did. It no longer does. Instead of being at the forefront of my mind constantly he's now at the back, he only gets brought to the front when something happens that reminds me.

I wonder if I should have done something differently. There are two moments in time when I was standing in front of two doors and knew absolutely the choice I was making. I just thought, both times, that it would be easier to get over. I thought I was making the right decision. The first time the decision was for me, if I'd known then what I know now I would never have made that decision. I don't know if it would have made a difference, only 50% of the choice was mine but I'd risk it all if I could go back in time and have a do-over.

The second time the choice was harder. The second time the choice was for him rather than myself. I don't know if I'd make the same decision again or not. I like to think I would. I like to think that, even knowing what I know now, that I would be a strong enough, good enough person to make that same decision. I promised myself and I promised him that I'd never ask it of him and I haven't. To ask wouldn't have been fair back then. Now, it still wouldn't be fair and I'm not even confident what the answer would be anymore.

I'm not unhappy about it right now. Just curious. As I said, it's just a dull ache. I don't get upset about it like I used to and for that I'm thankful.

I do wonder though. I wonder what would happen if I picked up my phone right now and sent him one word. If I just wrote Please. Would he know what mean, what I am pleading for? Would he care? Would he give me what I still, in my weak moments, desperately want?

I'll probably never know. I'm not going to send it. Not going to ask. I promised us both once that I wouldn't ask and I won't. Even if it never gets any easier than it is right now.

oi, oi, oi

It's sad how much my heart hurts right now because the concert is over. I want to be back there again right now. It was fucking amazing!

I've always said that Justin can dance but that it annoyed me he stole ALL of his moves from Michael Jackson. I was operating under the mistaken impression that Michael Jackson is more talented than Justin Timberlake. Now, granted, he may have been once but I'd say that contest is over and JT is the clear winner. (Compared the the Michael J of nowadays, the Jackson of old cannot even be compared to)

When Justin took to the stage last night and started dancing, flicking his microphone down and back up, rubbing his hands up and down scantily clad women and just generally OWNING the stage, well I just about died. It was so damn sexy, HE is so damn sexy. I'm sure there must have been some girls in the crowd brought to orgasm just from watching. (No, I wasn't one of them)

We originally had tickets to both the Friday night show and the Monday night show. I am very much wishing that we'd not sold the Friday night tickets and had instead gone twice.

Unsurprisingly, Justin Timberlake is an amazing performer and he puts on an amazing show. My favourite concerts have always been the one with plenty of audience interaction. I don't care that I know the performer has said the same stuff at every concert, I can suspend disbelief enough to pretend it's the truth and is just for us. Well, Justin certainly interacted with us a lot. He told us how much he loves our country, that he wants to live here and not to be surprised if he comes knocking on the door looking for sugar... While he's definitely said the same thing at a million other concerts, it was still damn cute.

The most impressive thing about the concert (other than the amazing dancing, laser show and the absolute sexiness of JT) was the energy Justin, his band and his back-up dancers put into it. He told us they have been touring since January and that last night was his final show of the whole tour. (I hadn't known that before but am VERY glad I ended up at the final show) Yet, despite the fact that they have performed the same show probably nearly a hundred times this year, (not even taking into account the thousands of hours of rehearsal) there was as much energy and enjoyment radiating off that stage as if it was the first time.

Justin, I'm sorry I was a doubter before. There is no question I will attend every future show you play in New Zealand.

Today is too cool and important to waste my time with Office quote titles. (I don't mean that John! I love you more than Justin. Honest)

The plan for today:
Go to work
Keep training someone on the roster
Come home
Get changed
Catch the train
WATCH JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE IN CONCERT!!!!!

Wooooooo!!!!!!

And today, that dream was shattered.

So, I've just washed my sheets. The sky is perfectly blue right now, not a grey cloud in sight. The curse is over people! I think my sheets will get dry!

Guess what I'm doing tomorrow night!?! You guessed it! Going to watch Justin Timberlake. Woo!!

I had a very realistic dream last night, it makes me wonder if it actually means something. I dreamt that I realised the 19th of December (my final day in Auckland) was only 3 and a half weeks away (true) and that I still hadn't booked my plane ticket to Los Angeles. I got very stressed and logged into the Air New Zealand website to quickly book my ticket. Unfortunately, because it's so soon it was a lot more expensive than I'd hoped. In fact, it was going to cost me $1800. That was my entire dream. I don't know why I was going to America, I just was. I've just logged into the Air New Zealand website to see how accurate the pricing in my dream was - a 1-way ticket to LA (which is what I was purchasing in my dream, so obviously I was planning to stay there) is $1659... That's pretty close!

This was a stressful dream so I was okay to wake up from it. I hate when I have really good realistic dreams. The disappointment upon waking up and realising it was only a dream is so hard to deal with first thing in the morning.

I love that when I wake up in the morning, after being in a shitty mood the night before, all is right again. I think it's a mixture of the sleeping and the writing, whatever it is, I feel perfectly normal again.

I'm still tired as hell but that's normal. I think most adults spend their entire lives tired. I'm hoping that over the coming months I will have plenty of time to catch up on my sleep. (Wow I really have a lot planned for these couple of months off, I wonder how much of it I'll actually get around to!)

Okay, shower time. Kat's got a migraine and is trying to sleep it off so I'm trying to be extra quiet. I've never had a migraine before but they sound pretty bloody awful.

Not sure what I'm going to do for the rest of the day. I should actually probably start packing but I don't want to. I have a day off the day before the movers come so I'll probably do all my packing that day. (Heh, yeah my good mood hasn't stretched to an enjoyment of packing yet. I doubt we'll ever see the day that happens.)

So, I'm pretty fucking pissed off right now. There are days I get like this. It only takes one thing to set me off and everything else that has been vaguely annoying me suddenly becomes a huge deal to me. And then I am in the mood I am in right now. The sort of mood that makes me wanna do something stupid. That makes me want to just walk away from everything right now. The sort of mood where I can understand exactly how people can walk away from their lives, and everyone they care about, to just start over somewhere else. But, I know myself well enough to know the mood will pass. That knowledge stops me from doing anything I will regret.

So, instead I will rant here, in writing. Thank god writing helps!

Holly's List of Things That Piss Her Off

1. When I go to a movie with friends and I don't get everything I ordered.
2. The fact that my own bad experience with the service at my place of work makes me wonder about how everyone else is treated. Shit, I didn't even pay and I feel ripped off. How must real customers feel?
3. I can't fucking relax and enjoy a movie at my workplace because I'm too fucking worried about the fuck-wit staff are doing.
4. The fact that some staff probably read this blog and are annoyed about what I just said. But face it guys, we have some great staff but we also have some retards. It's the retards that I'm talking about. I'm sure any staff that read this blog are fan-bloody-tastic.
5. When people don't listen to me.
6. When people don't do what I ask them to. I'm your fucking boss! If I tell you to do something then fucking well do it! Don't fucking talk back to me!
7. When people laugh at stuff that is just not funny.
8. The fact that I still have 25 days of this shit. I want to be home now.
9. People showing off.
10. When people go on and on and ON about something. Jesus Christ, enough already! Don't tell me the same fucking shit day after day. Don't you get it? I don't care!!
11. When people don't read body-language. If I'm not making eye contact and am pretty much just nodding my head and not participating in the conversation it's because I DON'T FUCKING CARE. There's only so far politeness can take me!
12. The fact that I am so fucking lazy. I know I need to exercise and lose weight but I just can't fucking be bothered.
13. The fact that I am not one of those people who can eat anything they like without gaining any weight.
14. Don't fucking tell me I'm blushing EVER. I don't care if I actually am. I don't want to hear it. One, you shouldn't tell anyone that anyway because you're just making fun of their embarrassment. Yeah way to be a good friend. Two, for me you are just highlighting the thing highest on my fucking list of things I fucking hate about myself. I don't tell you you're fat. I don't tell you that you have a big nose. I don't tell you that gigantic birth-mark covering half your face is ugly as hell. So don't fucking tell me I'm red. I KNOW! I've lived with myself for 25 fucking years. I'm not an idiot.
15. When I get into this mood and everyone pisses me off. Even innocent bystanders. I'm sorry. I don't want to be angry at you but I am. Just leave me the fuck alone.
16. When what started as a nice night ends up with me sitting at home in a fucking bad mood. Especially when it is the fault of my work.
17. That I feel guilty every moment I am not at work because I am worried about the place.
18. That people don't learn from their mistakes. Guess what, mistakes are the perfect opportunity to improve yourself. Don't be an idiot and compound the problem.
19. When people don't take the things that I think are important seriously.
20. That the stupid studios still have given the WGA what they want so the writers are still on strike meaning my favourite tv shows are slowly but surely disappearing.
21. Knowing I still have to do the dishes tonight but also knowing that I probably won't which means I've broken my own fucking rule after only 2 days.
22. That fuck who broke my heart. Yeah, he still pisses me off.
23. Spiders. Spiders fucking piss me off because they scare me so fucking much. I hate them.
24. That I can't fucking sleep in even when I want to. I just want to spend a whole day sleeping but it seems to be an impossibility.
25. It always fucking rains when I want to wash my sheets.
26. Bad spelling. (Especially when using anything with a spell-checker - it puts a little red line under words that are spelt wrong you fucking idiot! I can abide the wrong word being used far more than a nonsense, totally misspelled word.)
27. Packing. Packing really PISSES me off. I hate doing it. I'm moving real soon so I've gotta do it. That fucking sucks.
28. Not knowing who to trust.
29. Having to pretend to like people I actually hate because someone I genuinely do like is their friend and would be disappointed in me if I told the truth about my feelings.
30. The fact that I have sworn and blasphemed my way through this list because it makes me feel better.
31. The fact that, somewhere along the way, I lost my childhood innocence and I can never get it back.
32. That this list is so fucking long yet I actually have a good life and should be happy with it instead of pissed off.
33. That it's almost Christmas and I still have no idea what to get anybody. Plus, I have no money anyway.


Okay, I'm going to bed. I might add more when I wake up if I'm still angry.

And if they have to freeze me in pieces, so be it. I will wake up stronger than ever, because I will have used that time, to figure out exactly why I died. And what moves I could have used to defend myself better now that I know what hold he had me in.


Occasionally I get absolutely paralysed with fear at the idea of my parents dying. This has happened ever since I was a kid. I remember being pretty young and worrying that they would die and I'd have to grow up with other people as parents. I didn't want that. I adore my parents.

Nowadays the fear comes from the idea that each conversation with them will have been the last. I don't know what I'd do without my parents to talk to when I need them. I don't worry about this all the time, just sometimes. If I was an actor I could use that feeling to start crying if I needed to though, I can bring myself to tears just at the thought of it. (Scary in itself, if the idea of it is so hard then the reality will be far worse.)

I know it is something I am going to have to face at some point in my life. I just hope it is a VERY long way away. I used to hope that I would die first somehow but I don't anymore. So many times I've heard it said (and it's totally true) that it is unnatural for a parent to have to bury their child. I love my parents and it'll be devastating to me when they are gone but I don't want them to have to go through the pain of losing me either.

Okay, happy thoughts time. My parents are going to live for another 50 years so I have nothing to worry about.

I should be at Justin Timberlake tonight but we swapped our tickets to Monday night instead. There are 6 lucky people getting ready to go and use the tickets we sold them right now. (At absolute cost, I didn't try and rip anyone off.) But YAY, I get to see him on Monday. So excited!!!!!

Arghh!! Today was a very long day. I started work at 6am and didn't finish until almost 8pm. (Corrina, being awesome, came in to help me this morning so worked a mighty-long shift too)

This time next week I'll be on a flight to Wellington. It's pretty exciting that I get to see Justin Timberlake in concert in the same week I watch David Beckham play soccer. Talk about a week of awesome celebrities. (If only I was seeing my John do something, that'd be even better.)

4 weeks today I will be in the car driving home to Wellington, this time for good. It's pretty exciting but also totally scary and sad. I'm going to miss this place a lot. People keep getting really surprised when I say I have no idea what I'll be doing for a job when I get down there. It's strange because I don't see that as a very big deal. I figure I should be able to pick something up pretty easily. I hope I'm not wrong! If I do end up studying (which hopefully I will) I will FINALLY be able to get a student allowance. My parents earned too much when I was at uni but now that I am over 25 (old) my parents income doesn't matter anymore. Yay!

Okay, I'm going to have something to eat and watch some TV. See you all tomorrow!

It interests me how personal someone's iPod can be. Myself, I'm really not keen on anyone getting hold of my iPod and going through it. It's not the songs themselves that I feel are private... Hell, I don't care about even the most embarrassing songs on my iPod. It's the make-up of the playlists that is so personal.

Music is a reflection of a person's feelings. Someone's mood can often be easily identified by the songs they are listening to. I'm a very private person. I often won't tell people what's going on in my head. (Even when talking about it would probably be a lot better for me than keeping it all bottled up inside.) For this reason I don't want people going through the playlists that I have, particularly the ones I am listening to. At times I have had playlists with names that are pretty revealing. I've ceased to do that but it still wouldn't take much for someone who knows me well to work out exactly what is going on with me purely based on an iPod playlist.

I don't know how people can go without music. My iPod is a permanent fixture in my bag. I hate the times when it goes flat or I forget to take it with me. Yet some people never, or hardly ever, listen to music. Weirdos!

I only have 8 days off left until I finish up with Hoyts. That's such a weird thought. I've got 4 more rosters and 4 more stocktakes. (2 of those stocktakes require me to start at 6am though which sucks) I'm getting really sad about leaving. Not about leaving work so much, I'm pretty damn excited about not having a job for a little while, (not so excited about the lack of money though) but I'm very sad about leaving a company I have really loved working for. The thing I'm most sad about though, obviously, is the people I'm going to be leaving behind. It's inevitable that, while I'll stay in contact with some of them, I will lose contact with most of them. That REALLY sucks. But, it's also life.

We went and fed the ducklings (and eels) again today. The ducklings are so cute! The eels not so much.

Now I'm home watching Hells Kitchen and cooking my dinner. Tonight is tuna and mashed potato. Back when I lived in Wellington my stock dinners, if I was on my own, were tuna on toast, tuna and mashed potato and chicken sandwiches. If it wasn't just me then it'd be a bit more interesting, steak, lamb or chicken with vegetables. I just can't be bothered with cooking. I can do it okay but I don't enjoy it so I usually go for the quick meals.

Since I've lived in Auckland I don't really do the chicken sandwiches. There's no point buying chicken for just myself. (Not a problem at all since I eat chicken when I'm out far more up here than I did down there since there are a lot more chicken type places to chose from.) So, tuna is now my stock meal. I LOVE it. It amazes me I never get sick of eating it. Yum.

Because of my love of tuna, Kat has taken to calling me Big Tuna. (Stolen from The Office - Andy calls Jim Big Tuna) It's funny.

We made a list of dvds we need to watch before I leave. There are only 12 on the list but that's going to be a big challenge since I'm only here another 5 weeks. Wow. 5 weeks. I think it's going to pass exceptionally fast. It's pretty scary actually. I'm far more nervous about moving back home than I was about moving up here in the first place. I know that's weird and I don't really understand it myself. It's just the way it is.

Okay, dinner is ready. :-)

I have decided that it is time for another list. As you all know, there are two things I love more than anything else in the world. The question has always been which do I love more, John Krasinski or Mountain Dew. Well folks, here it is, for the first time I publicly declare a favourite.

Why John Krasinski is better than Mountain Dew

1. Whenever I get an annoying song stuck in my head I can get rid of it by listening to (or imagining) John Krasinski singing Hero by Enrique Iglesias. (A much more pleasant thing to have stuck in my head!) Mountain Dew never helps me get rid of annoying songs.

2. If I could only take two things with me to a desert island they would be Mountain Dew and John Krasinski. If I could take only one thing, well I'd miss Mountain Dew but John'd keep me much warmer and more entertained. :-P

3. John Krasinski makes me laugh on a regular basis. Mountain Dew only makes me laugh when I think about their old tag-line - "There's nothing more satisfying than slamming a dew."

4. Cuddling up to a bottle at night isn't that pleasant. Cuddling up to John would be VERY, VERY pleasant!

5. (Look away for this one mum!) Sex with John Krasinski would be much more comfortable (and satisfying and NOT gross) than sex with a bottle of Mountain Dew.

6. John Krasinski makes a lot of money which he could share with me. Mountain Dew just costs me a lot of money.

7. Mountain Dew can't make a 'Jim face' to cheer me up.

8. John Krasinski would be a much better conversationalist.

9. John Krasinski doesn't ruin my teeth (although he does have an interesting effect on other parts of me!)

10. People will be jealous of me when I marry John. They would not be jealous if I married mountain dew - they'd just think I was a freak!

11. I think accents are sexy as hell. Mountain Dew can't even speak let alone do accents. John, on the other hand, is the master of accents.

12. John Krasinski looks GREAT with a shirt off. The Mountain Dew equivalent of a shirt off is no label and that just doesn't get me going at all.

13.

14.

15.


I think those last three speak for themselves!

Labels: John Krasinski, Mountain Dew, Top 10 List

Today we went on a picnic at the lagoon right near our house. It was cool. There were ducklings and we fed them bread crusts. There were also eels!! I DO NOT like eels!

Happily, Kat and I both said the same thing at the same time during our picnic and I jinxed her. Unlike primary school, in our version of jinx (taken from The Office) you have to buy the person a coke before you can talk again. Kat forgot for a moment and commented on the eels. She also cheated by txting me. Ah well, it was fun anyway and she did very well. I just finished drinking my coke. It was good.

We have a new punishment for when blogging is next forgotten. I think this punishment is actually going to be worse than eating a blenderised Happy Meal. We have to watch, without any breaks except toilet breaks, all 3 extended editions of Lord of the Rings. They have to be watched back-to-back and you can't do anything else while you are watching. While it doesn't really sound all that bad at first listen, really think about it. That's over ten hours of watching, on your day off. At least the blenderised Happy Meal was over in a jiffy.

We let off the last of our fireworks last night. 'Finale' gave us a huge fright. We had forgotten that it made a really loud noise, it was the middle of the night. Kat spun around and slammed herself into the wall when the screeching started and I pulled my t-shirt up over my eyes. I don't know why we thought either of these things would help shut it up, but somehow we did. Really, those reactions were just pretty dumb because they didn't stop the sound and they meant neither of us actually watched the firework. So, basically, we woke our neighbour up with a really loud noise and we didn't even get any enjoyment out of watching the thing!

I just got saved. Absolutely saved.

If you read Kat's blog you will see that I was about to have to eat a blenderised happy meal myself.

Due to this rule that I posted earlier and didn't clarify:

The rules I play by mean that the most I can write in preparation for a blog is 5 words. Any more than that and it's not an original post that day, in my opinion.

I wrote, into a text document, that bit about me and Kat having a nice moment Thursday night while we were mucking around. I then wrote it into my blog yesterday. (Actually I didn't even open the text document since I remembered what I'd wanted to say, but since we are working purely on the basis of technicalities here that didn't matter.)

I'd argued for a minute. Then realised I had to concede defeat. It's a game with not very well-defined rules. At this stage it's unlikely either me or Kat will ever actually forget to blog. It's habit for both of us now (I've probably jinxed it now and I'm gonna forget). So, we're only ever going to fail on technicalities.

I got angry at the text document I'd written the night before. As I was going to click on it I must have hovered for a second cos the information about it came up. It was saved and closed JUST after midnight!!!! (Hell, I didn't even know text documents had times and dates. I thought that was a Microsoft Word thing only. Suddenly I'm feeling a lot more fond of text documents.)

I don't know how I got so lucky that it was after midnight. I didn't know at the time that it was after midnight and I had no suspicions today, when desperately trying to think of ways out of the punishment, that it had actually been posted after midnight. (It was 12.03am - how lucky is that!?!)

(I think my future husband's expression sums it up best. Even though you can't read the date and time I thought I'd post this anyway cos I love that picture on my desktop)


(Zoomed in so you can actually see the date and time)


I've been thinking about how to define my rules so that this doesn't happen again. I know what I meant but I can't quite explain it so, instead I'm going to change the rule. (Don't worry, I'm actually making it stricter on myself).

The new rule is this: I'm not allowed to write more than 5 words of a blog in preparation unless I quote myself (with proper referencing) in the blog I use that writing in. I must also write a further 150 words to qualify it as an original blog. The further 150 words can be on the same or a different topic.

Phew. I'm going to now sit here and bask in my luck. (Sheesh I hope I haven't used up luck that was going to win me lotto or something. I would rather eat a blenderised happy meal than miss out on winning lotto!)

Last night me and Kat were hanging out. (As usual) We were chatting and mucking around. I thought we were having a really nice moment when suddenly Kat pipes up with "I'm really going to miss your chairs when you leave." This comment brought me to the sad realisation that while I was having a nice moment with Kat, she was having a nice moment with my chair. Gutted.

We also discovered last night that, for pretty much the whole time we've lived here, Greys Anatomy has been out of order. Kat obsessively alphabetises our DVDs yet she never noticed that Greys Anatomy was sitting between Fresh Prince and Friday Night Lights. Pretty funny.

It also led me to a neat trick to play on her one day. I shall swap all the DVDs around one day while she is sleeping. Hehehe it'll blow her mind! (Unfortunately now that I've shared that I plan to do it, and in a public place no less, it's not going to be such a surprise. It'll still blow her mind though!)

Okay I better go. It's my brother's birthday so I better go give him a call. (He's 34! Old!)

I think one of the prerequisites to becoming a hairdresser must be a great memory. My hairdresser always remembers where I work, what we talked about last time I was there, what I got done last time I was there and my current relationship status. This is even more impressive since she works at a very busy salon and I only go in about once every 8-10 weeks.

Man, I'd suck as a hairdresser. Most days I can't remember what I had for breakfast let alone remembering details about heaps of different clients. Heh my memory isn't as bad as that of my boss though. He is tragic. Often asks me the same question 5 or 6 times over a period of a few days/weeks even though I answer it every single time.

In other news, my favourite show goes off the air tomorrow. The last episode of The Office airs tomorrow and then there is none left. The strike is still going on and there is no end in sight. At this moment in time it looks likely that there will be no more episodes for 12 months. That is an incredibly awful prospect.

There are only 3 episodes left of Heroes (my second favourite show). They've shot an alternate ending so that they can round of the season in 3 weeks and that is the one they plan on airing. I fully support the writers but I gotta say, this strike sucks major arse.

So, something great happened today. I figured it out. All of it. The meaning of life. Okay, maybe that’s taking it a little far but I did figure out the meaning of my own life. It took talking to a stranger to work it all out. He put it all into perspective for me in a way it’s never been before. I think it was because he is a stranger that it all suddenly made sense. He had no hidden agenda, no personal opinion and no reason to try and keep me happy. (I’m now just hoping this isn’t one of those passing stages I get so excited about and then realise isn’t what I want at all. I don’t think so though. This feels different.)

I’m not quite ready to share yet. This feels like a somewhat personal journey and I need to figure out some details before I’m ready to talk about it. The good news is that, without even realising it, I’ve started on my journey. Moving up to Auckland was the first part and moving back to Wellington is the second. I’ve needed this year here, it’s been good for me.

Ever since I was a kid I’ve had this idea of what my life would be like and, up until this point, life has never panned out how I thought it would. I’ve been miserable and depressed about that for a long time but now I realise that was stupid. Life isn’t over and there is still plenty of time for it to work out exactly as I had planned it. It’s never too late and I haven’t stuffed anything up. In fact, without even knowing it, I’ve been making the right choices all along.

I realise this is all random and doesn’t make sense to anyone else since I’m not explaining what it is I realised today. But, first and foremost this blog is about me and is written for me, that others get any enjoyment out of it is really just a bonus. In a year to 18 months, hopefully you can all look back on this post and say “So that’s what she was talking about!”

For the last few months I’ve been secretly scared because I’ve had no desire whatsoever to write. I was beginning to think I was leaving my job to pursue my dream of being a writer right when the desire had left me. Thankfully, with my realisations came the desire to write again.

Just like Hiro from Heroes, I know that there are certain things I am destined for. (Not saving the world, nothing so grand I’m afraid.) I have decided that I am going to make those things happen. The reason I’m writing this? To inspire me. So I can’t just claim it was a random thought I had one night. To make sure I actually get out there and fucking do it.

We can talk about that

Since living in Auckland I have discovered a way to make it rain that is far more reliable than a rain-dance. Admittedly it is Auckland, so you can expect rain on a fairly regular basis anyway. But, my technique is so foolproof that it will bring about rain even on the hottest, sunniest of days.

Why would I want to make it rain, you ask? I don't! In fact, I think it is because I don't want it to rain that my method works so well. The universe is against me and as soon as I desperately don't want rain, it appears on the horizon.

So what is this ingenious method? Washing my sheets. Yup, that's right, every single fucking time I was my sheets grey clouds appear within moments of me getting them out on the line. Today was a beautiful day. Kat pointed out early on that it would be the perfect time to wash my sheets. It was hot, sunny with just a slight breeze. Perfect. I put my sheets on the line about an hour ago. Since then I have watched as ominous grey clouds have made their way across the sky. The kicker? They are currently above my house, and pretty much ONLY my house. I can see sunny, blue sky in every direction except straight up.

My sheets are currently still out there but I am poised to run outside the moment the rain begins. And it will begin, of that I have no doubt. I'm hoping they get mostly dry before the rain comes along so the dehumidifier can finish them off when I inevitably have to bring them in still a bit damp.

*sigh*

This is a private friend who happens to know all of us from different ways who is throwing a private birthday thing...

The countdown is on. There are things I'm not looking forward to about leaving Auckland - leaving Kat being the top reason and not having any money being the second. (There are other reasons as well but I'm not going to list all of them here) However, I am exceptionally excited about not ever having to do the roster or stocktake again. After completing today's roster I only have 5 rosters and 5 stocktakes left. Awesome!

It was a beautiful, hot day today. Gutted that I had to be at work. Being at the beach would have been far more appropriate. Oh wait! In 6 weeks the beach is exactly where I'll be! :-)

Tonight all the managers from work are going out for dinner. It's a goodbye to our boss and a couple of managers. It should be fun. It's at Garrisons which means a nice dinner. Certainly can't complain about that.

I find it confusing when I have to name my nationality. On forms I usually tick the box that says 'New Zealand European' but I've gotta say, I think that the adding of European on there is pretty dumb. A New Zealander or a Kiwi is what I want to say when asked my nationality.

The part that confuses me is the 'a' at the beginning. I say I am a New Zealander. Just saying I am New Zealander doesn't make any sense. Yet, every other nationality I can think of doesn't require the a at the beginning. Why is that?

I shall give you some examples:

I am American
I am Australian
I am South African
I am English
I am Zimbabwean
I am Israli
I am Indian
I am Chinese
I am Japanese
I am Turkish
I am Romanian
I am Puerto Rican
I am Dominican
I am Scottish
I am Irish
I am Welsh

So why do we have to have that stupid fricking a?. I don't know why I care so much. I just do damn it!

In other news, Kat ate her blenderised happy meal today. It was DISGUSTING. I tried a little bit and almost vomited. It certainly convinced me that I never, EVER want to forget to blog.

Tomorrow is blenderised Happy Meal day. Make sure you tune into Kat's blog to check out the video. The eating is at 1pm tomorrow, video posted in the evening. It is going to be the funnest thing EVER!! (also probably the funniest thing ever!)

Ah, life is so good. Thank god it wasn't me that forgot!!! :-)

Oompa Loompa Doompity Dawesome
Kat did not blog which is totally awesome
What does this mean? Why is it so great?
It means she's gotta eat McDonalds mush
Doompity doom


Thanks to Andy from The Office for the inspiration for that little song. (I know it doesn't rhyme but neither did his) And, of course, we mustn't forget Kat who made history today by forgetting to blog. That's right boys and girls, it's blenderised happy meal time!!

Woo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was walking home today when some sprinklers I was walking past turned on. Luckily they didn't wet me - I would have felt quite silly if they had.

Wow. So, I have nothing to say. Not that this is unusual by any stretch of the imagination. This whole 'posting every single day' thing can be a bit tough at times. I am a little bit envious of Kat's rules because she can prepare blogs in advance. The rules I play by mean that the most I can write in preparation for a blog is 5 words. Any more than that and it's not an original post that day, in my opinion. Then again, I think the reason Kat can prepare blogs in advance is that she doesn't find them as easy to write as I do... (I don't mean that how I just realised that sounds. What I mean is that I am a rambler so I just start typing and it's a whole steam of consciousness. Kat writes about actual stuff, which is much more interesting.) But, anyway, if I was to prepare blogs in advance it'd be the easiest game in the world. I get in a blogging mood 2 or 3 times a week and could easily write on 5 or 6 topics each of those times. I'd have a huge backlog of blogs waiting to happen.

It'll be interesting to see what happens when I finish work. Less will be happening in my life (wow, I can hardly believe that is possible) but I'll be in a much more writing frame of mind. My blogging will hopefully loosen me up for a day of serious writing each day.

Heh perhaps you should all expect many, many blogs about the beach since that's where I will be spending the majority of my time!

Okay, I'm off to cook dinner....

I was happily walking to work this morning, listening to my iPod. On my way I had a small epiphany and it literally put a bounce in my step. It was kind of funny actually, I felt myself stand taller and my pace quickened. Suddenly a girl walked past me and continued on her way. I found this surprising because I actually thought I was walking really fast.

It's always really disconcerting (and disappointing) when you think you are walking fast and then people start passing you. I can't understand it. How are they so much faster than me? It's not always fitter people either - this girl was definitely not fitter than me! Hehe I guess I just have little legs....

Work was long today. It was also painful. With only 6 weeks to go until I am back in Wellington (exactly 6 weeks today) there is a lot to iron out at work. I could just leave everything in a mess but I really don't want to do that. I actually like the company I work for and want to leave them on good terms. This desire, unfortunately, means I'll need to put in a lot of extra hours to get everything sorted out. Yuck.

Why do they make shampoo and conditioner bottles the same size? I'm not sure about anyone else's but the brand I use, Herbal Essences, have the same size bottles for both. It drives me crazy because I go through shampoo WAY faster than conditioner. I would like to run out of both at the same time so I can replace both at the same time. It just makes more sense that way.

I need a haircut but I really hate going to get them so I always put it off as long as possible. I hate having to sit there and make small talk with the hairdresser, while staring at myself in the mirror and then pretending I love it when she is done. (when, in fact, it looks exactly the same as always just tidier.)

My other problem with hairdressers is that I am convinced they can all read minds. I'm not joking. They can. I reckon it's cos they're touching your head. Seriously though, I always find myself monitoring my thoughts very closely to make sure I am not thinking of anything that will offend or shock the hairdresser. I think what I am actually afraid of is that my thoughts will show clearly on my face. I'm not used to daydreaming while under close scrutiny. It makes me uncomfortable.

This girl I know (and don't like much) wants to be a stand-up comic. When I first heard that I will admit that I judged her for it. Stand-up comic to me just doesn't scream career. It only took about 15 seconds for me to realise how much of a hypocrite this made me since 'writer' also doesn't scream career, particularly in New Zealand. So, after my 15 seconds of judging her for it, I became extremely impressed and jealous in equal measure. Impressed because she knows what she wants and is out there making it happen. Jealous because I, so far, haven't been brave enough to take the plunge and make my dream a reality.

The thing is I witnessed some of her comedy last night. Um... It wasn't funny. And not just because I don't particularly like her. I was prepared to laugh a lot anyway but, sadly, I did not. Now, I'm no expert, but I'm pretty sure one of the prerequisites of being a stand-up comic is being funny. You don't necessarily have to be quick on your feet with the jokes (although I'm sure it helps) but you do have to be able to write good material and then perform it. From what I have seen she can't do this. She's not unfunny but she didn't seem to be 'this is my job, stand-up comic' funny. I broke a smile once or twice but the only time I laughed out loud was when she made a joke about how lame it was to do something that I actually do.

Now, I'm very easy to amuse but not as easy to make laugh raucously. I'm a pretty quiet person in general so I might give a brief chuckle but I'm not a 'throw back my head and chortle at the ceiling' kind of girl. When something makes me really, really laugh then I know it was top of the line funny. I don't need every purportedly funny thing to make me do this. I think that would be annoying actually. But, for me to not even laugh out loud is a worry for someone who wants to make this their career.

Oh well. Luckily my opinion doesn't have any impact on her success. She seems to be doing okay for herself in the comedy business. I'm probably just wrong. But, an evil little part of me will forever be slightly satisfied that I believe I am funnier than she is.

Heartbreaking

There was no 11th hour save. The WGA went on strike. Already it has affected me in the most heartbreaking of ways, my favourite show was the first to be shut down. Steve Carell and Rainn Wilson did not show up for filming today on The Office. Apparently improv by actors who are also members of the WGA (most of The Office cast) is against the rules. The actors of The Office are all excellent at improv and from what I hear a lot of improv goes on during filming. Therefore, filming is pretty much going to break the rules so they might as well just shut down.

For The Office this means that, unless the strike is resolved quickly, November 15th will be the finale of their season. Sucks since they didn't prepare for that so it'll just play out as a normal episode and we'll be left with a very incomplete feeling season.

A couple of other shows have shut down production as well... The New Adventures of Old Christine is the only one I actually know. Oh, and all talk shows.

Let's all hope for a resolution very quickly! I can't help thinking about all the 'little people' on a set who live from paycheck to paycheck and who will no longer be getting paid due to the strike.

Me and Kat just spent a good 45 minutes or so playing with fireworks.

There were some good ones - Sheen was the best.
Some scary ones - me and Kat both got a little bit frightened while a very screechy one was going off.
Some okay ones - Quite fun (yes, that is actually the name of the firework - Quite Fun. The name pretty much sums it up.)
Some lame ones - these tiny little ones that are MUCH cooler when you set them all off at once.

All in all we had a good time. Somehow, loser that I am, I managed to forget how to use a lighter not once but twice. I'm not kidding. I was happily lighting fireworks and then suddenly I couldn't use the lighter anymore. I had to give it to Kat to 'fix'. Only, it didn't require any fixing either time. I was just lame.

I hope that don't ban fireworks next year. I get why they want to and it makes total sense. If people are going to be hurting animals with them then I can totally support the idea of banning them. Gee, I will miss playing with them though.

I left my cellphone at work. So, so annoying! Now the decision is whether or not to drive back to work and pick it up. Logically I know I have to go and get it but I really don't want to.

Other than that annoyance work was the usual. Roster day over for another week. Excellent. Still stocktake to do this week and a few other issues that I have to deal as well but I guess it isn't too bad.

Ummm what else? Kat bought fireworks. Fireworks are awesome.

I thought I'd blog again since this morning's was just an update of yesterday's blog.

It scares me that recently I've been enjoying some reality tv. Usually I hate it, I've never liked Big Brother, Survivor, American Idol, New Zealand Idol or any of that other stuff. I admit that a few years ago I really enjoyed this New Zealand reality tv show that was a cross between Big Brother and The Weakest Link. But, other than that, I haven't really ever enjoyed reality tv.

Right now I absolutely adore Hells Kitchen (so much better than Top Chef which I like as well) and I'm currently watching So You Think You Are Smarter Than a 10-Year Old and it's really good. (I'm not, by the way. Smarter than a ten year-old I mean. I've got an embarrassing number of the questions wrong.)

I tell Kat she is a smarty-pants a lot. The reason, of course, is because she is a smarty-pants. She always has the answers to my questions. It's good. And useful.

Okay, quick update on the WGA situation since I just read 2 interesting (and heart-breaking) pieces of information.

- Heroes is shooting an alternative ending to the final episode they have written in case they have to use it as the finale to an abbreviated season if the strike continues for too long.

- Greg Daniels said at The Office convention that every month of the strike will reduce the season of The Office by 3 episodes.

:(

The Writers Guild of America (WGA) have gone on strike. This sucks BIG time. From what I hear the Teamsters are thinking about supporting the WGA which will just add to the mess.

Basically the writers strike means that no-one who is a member of the WGA (everyone who writes for film or television HAS to be a member so this means every single currently employed writer) will be writing anything until the strike has been resolved. The last WGA strike was in 1988 and lasted 22 weeks. So, there's not guarantee it will be resolved quickly.

Most TV shows have written episodes through until December or January. These episodes will still be able to be filmed so until then our viewing pleasure won't be affected. (There is a bit more confusion when the writer also acts in another role, producer, actor, director etc. It is only the writing they are not ALLOWED to do but they are being encouraged not to do anything else either). However, past January, if the strike hasn't been resolved all new television will be disappearing off our screens. Not only that, but there will be no new blockbuster films being shot. (Luckily the studios have seen this coming so they probably have a backlog of scripts waiting to be shot right now. But, at some point, the known writers not being allowed to write for a long period of time will catch up with the film industry.)

If the teamsters get involved and decide to strike in order to help the WGA then it will be a whole different ballgame. The teamsters is a union that encompasses a wide variety of labourers. Without teamsters there will be no-one to move equipment, no-one to drive trucks and no caterers (to name a few things). Essentially production will grind to a halt immediately. In about 3 weeks when we catch up to what has already been shot and locked away there will be nothing else...

It pretty much sucks for any tv or movie fan. Fingers crossed everything gets resolved quickly!!

Yeah, I have no idea what I am going to blog about so I just picked the first Office quote I thought of. Now the trick is to blog about something that at least vaguely relates.

I actually had something really cool I wanted to write about, I thought of it this morning while I was in the shower. Unfortunately I don't have a pen and paper with me when I am in the shower so I didn't write it down.

Ummm okay time to relate my title to my blog. How to do this? HOW to do this? Oh! I know!

My nephew is awesome. He is a little cutie. He is also INCREDIBLY smart. Trouble is, he's smart at reading but not very good at maths. Being way above your age-group at one subject and slightly below probably isn't the best thing. It means his teacher probably doesn't give him as much attention as he needs.

So, that was pretty boring.

Kat is currently talking about anal sex....

That's enough rubbish for today.

Break me off a piece of that...

One job I've always thought would be hilarious is a radiologist. From what I hear, you get to see some funny stuff stuck in some funny places. People often do strange things and I always love witnessing their strangeness.

The worst one I've ever heard of is a Kit Kat bar. A Kit Kat bar!!!! What the fuck? So, some girl woke up in the morning feeling a bit horny. She sees a Kit Kat bar sitting on the bedside table and thinks to herself 'why not'?? I'll tell you why not! Because that shit is going to hurt! I'm guessing that it was a Kit Kat Chunky although I can't be certain. (For those of you not in the know about chocolate bars, a Kit Kat Chunky is like a really big version of the single wafers.) Those things have corners and I really do not think corners and inserting things into oneself go together AT ALL.

Honestly, what are some people thinking? Do you think she planned to eat the chocolate afterwards? 'Oh, I know, I'll have a mind-blowing orgasm from the chocolate bar and then I'll get to eat the chocolate too. Double the fun! Why hasn't anyone thought of this before?' Because it's fucking stupid is why!!

The girl had to be American right, probably from the South? I'm sure this is one of those "Only in America" things. Or maybe she's from Tasmania and her father is her brother... Yeah, that's gotta be it. No other explanation for that kind of mind-blowing stupidity. Masturbation with uncomfortable-shaped objects + born from an incestuous union = not surprising.